The teenage years present a specific set of challenges for all parents. We want our kids to excel in school because grades and test performance are important factors for college entrance. We tend to tell them that their high school years are critical to their future success, and that for their own good, we expect them to measure up. Parenting according to the law of attraction teaches us that our job is to all our children to learn to rely on their internal guidance system.
Is it realistic to put those high expectations on our kids when their brains are not yet fully formed or engaged? In our culture, teenagers get zero credibility or support for using their own internal guidance system. There are probably many parents who would deny that their teenager even has an internal guidance system. It is an unfortunate view to take as a parent, because at this age, it is especially important that a teen use, fine-tune, and trust their IGS.
Encouraging your teen to trust and follow their IGS can be extremely frustrating for parents because we can’t help but notice when our kids make choices that we believe are not in their best interest. Interestingly enough, we also notice that we have absolutely no control over some of these choices.
It is important to remember as a parent, that when your kid puts off an important assignment until the last minute, or goofs off the night before an exam, they will learn the lessons they need to learn if you have taught your kid about his or her IGS. Your child will learn quickly that a lack of study and effort produces poor results. If your kid doesn’t care about results, so be it. If your child does care about results he or she will listen to their IGS and allot more time for study and preparation for the next project or exam.
It is challenging to let your kids find their own way and make their own decisions when you do not agree with them. It is even harder to watch them seemingly fail. When you try to push against behavior you disapprove of and to guide your children to what you think is their highest choice, it generally turns out to be a futile fight. Children of any age benefit most when we relax and stop trying to control their behavior and experiences.
Remember that by experiencing what they don’t want, kids more clearly define what they do want. Sometimes life is not all about making the highest choice on the first go round. We are here to evolve and grow, and part of that evolution includes learning what we do not want so we can discover what we do want.